Friday, December 27, 2013

Dead animals

What's my biggest fear in the whole world?  It's dead animals.  Not animal spirits but the bodies of animals lying on the ground or in the road looking up at me with their vacant stares.  It makes me sick just thinking about it.

I've spent my entire life being terrified of dead animals.  I never understood it and never stopped screaming in absolute terror every time I came across one.  I've been known to avoid whole streets for days just because I saw a dead squirrel on the side of the road.  The older I get the more I wonder why I am this way.  Slowly I am starting to figure out this phobia of mine.

I know for a fact I am not afraid of dead people.  I've been to many funerals even as a kid and I never had trouble understanding that the bodies were just empty vessels and that their souls had already vacated the premises.  I found it fascinating but never scary.  I eventually started to wonder about animals.  Up until a few years ago I had never seen an animal spirit.  I'd see these dead bodies lying on the road and I wondered if they were completely gone for good once they die on this earth.  I always thought animals had souls but I never saw proof.  It not only disturbed me it also made me incredibly sad.

I finally sat and prayed to my higher powers to ask for a sign that animals did have spirits that traveled through dimensions just like people do.  I even wrote a prayer with my request and burned it under a full moon and then buried the ashes.  Sure enough I saw proof not one time but two.  The first time was when an older man spirit visited me in my room when I was about to go to sleep.  I looked over to find him pacing my room and I was shocked and excited to see many furry critters scurrying around his feet.  There were chipmunks and squirrels galore.  I told him "Thank you" about ten times and went to sleep dreaming peaceful dreams.  The next time I saw spirit animals was a few months back when I was driving to town.  I saw a dead deer on the side of the road and thought to myself  "I wonder where his soul goes?"  Sure enough within 10 seconds of that thought my vision opened up and I saw hundreds of animal spirits standing in the fields on both sides of the road.  They stood there with nothing but sadness and confusion on their beautiful faces.  Some looked at the road wondering how their death came about, it was so sudden.  The others looked at me with a glimmer of hope that I could possibly help them understand.  Tears streamed down my face because I finally understood what my fears were all about and because I could feel their pain, confusion, and fear.

Animals have no voice. They have no way of telling us when something is wrong.  They have no way of really understanding the concept of cars driving down a road.  They have no idea that people are waiting in the woods with a gun.  Their fear, pain, confusion, and sorrow is so evident, so real, and so consuming that it's unbearable.  I realized that I was not only capable of feeling and sensing animals that were living but I was also feeling these animals in spirit form.

A few weeks later I was walking my dog and I saw a dead squirrel several feet ahead of us.  Instead of immediately panicking and running in the opposite direction I chose to walk towards the animal.  The closer I got the more intense the feelings became.  My nerves were a wreck, I couldn't breathe, and I was so afraid.  I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and opened myself up as if I was preparing to communicate with my spirit guide or other spirits.  Sure enough, when I opened my eyes I saw this little squirrel spirit standing next to its body in complete shock.  The death was so sudden she didn't even realize she was dead.  I used my usual method of speaking to the dead (in my mind) and did my best to convey what had happened and where she was needed and that her family and friends were waiting for her (weird to say, I know).  I then used my animal healing techniques to radiate as much love, calmness, and happiness to transfer to this amazing creature so she could feel what I was feeling.  I noticed she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  Then she opened her eyes and she disappeared.  My feelings of fear and anxiety were gone immediately.  I looked down at the gruesome sight of this animal and it was just that:  An empty vessel with blood and guts.  I was still sad for the life this squirrel lost and for the voice she didn't have but I was relieved to know she was where she belonged.  I finally understood what it was all about.

And just like that my phobia of dead animals disappeared forever.

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