Tuesday, January 7, 2014

The deal I made to find my true purpose

I feel like we are all put on this earth for a certain purpose.  Some are meant to be doctors to save lives, others are humanitarians, others are here to teach people hard lessons in life.  There are times where I feel like I have it all figured out when it comes to my true purpose for being on this Earth.  Other times I become overwhelmed and confused and irritated because I wish I could have someone just tell me flat out what my life's purpose really is.  I think the beauty of the human experience is the whole not knowing thing.  We get to just "wing it".  We receive limitless amounts of choices and chances to change our fate.  Some will cease every opportunity and relish at the gifts the world and universe has to offer while other people will walk blindly through life never loving, never giving, and never really living at all.

I like to think of myself as the first person.  The one who takes advantage of every opportunity I am given.  The one who makes the best of every situation.  The one who grows from every experience and hopefully gets better with age.  And most importantly the one who will never turn their back on someone in need or at  the chance to help any way that I can.

A couple of years ago I was really starting to come into my own spiritually.  My medium skills started to really come out, my psychic gifts were becoming stronger, and my revelations of being a healer were really shining.  I also started to stretch myself way too thin in every area of my life.  I was so excited to experience these amazing gifts that I took every opportunity I could to practice and flex those "muscles".  I also volunteered several times a week with various animal rescues in the area in addition to my personal training duties AND my family duties.  I had trouble saying no to anyone.  I felt that it was my duty to contribute to anyone that needed help.  I was exhausted, very exhausted, and slightly resentful.

I finally stopped volunteering so much and I slowly learned to say no to an extent.  Around that time I felt my psychic gifts starting to waver.  I felt out of touch, depressed, and I wasn't able to really experience any spirit communications. It was incredibly frustrating and unnerving.   A good friend of mine does soul communication and offered to do a session for me to help me get out of my annoying rut.  She talked to my spirit guides and what she referred to as "The Divine Spirit" and asked for guidance.  She also asked what my true purpose in life was.  The session was so enlightening.  I was told how to strengthen my gifts back, how to get back in touch with my spiritual side.  I was told that first and foremost I was a healer in every aspect, especially with animals (I had never discussed this before with my friend so that was a pleasant surprise).  I was meant to spread the word and inspire through writing and giving and teaching.  I was born to be a leader and to take on a lot of responsibilities in the future.  I was told a lot more that helped me really understand why I really was put on this Earth.  I made an agreement right then and there to give it all I've got.  I promised the divine spirit and my guides that I will never turn my back on anyone or anything in need in exchange for this knowledge and for these amazing gifts I was given.  I promised that I will not let these gifts or my existence go to waste.  I will make my experience on earth worthwhile.  I promised that I will fulfill my true purpose and destiny.  I promised that I will not disappoint.

Since then I've volunteered regularly, I still give food and money and anything else I have in my possession to the homeless and others in need, and I never turn my back on someone asking for help or spiritual guidance no matter how trying they can be.  My husband often gets frustrated with the fact that I don't charge as much as I should or that I will do endless amounts of tarot readings, emails, and home visits for healings and paranormal sessions without receiving anything in return.  Sometimes I understand where he's coming from.  It's not always fun to give so much of yourself without any form of payment.  At the same time, though, I remind myself of the amazing gifts I was given, the wise words the divine and guides gave me, and most of all the deal I made to myself and with them to never waste a moment of my life being selfish and spoiled, to never waste these gifts.

I have never regretted making that agreement all those months ago.  In fact, I feel motivated and inspired by making the promises I made.  I had the opportunity to have my true purpose laid out in front of me so that I can never doubt myself again, so that I will never feel ashamed of who I really am.  I feel like I've been born again, as if I can finally see the world for what it really is: Absolutely Amazing.  In all of my life I've never been so confident in myself and of the path I'm taking.  And boy does it feel fantastic.

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